Permissive parenting vs Pragmatic parenting

A famous quote on parenting says  "parenting is a verb ..it's not about who you are as parent, it is about what you do as a parent ".

In the present scenario it's also about what type or category of parenting you belong to, are you a
'Permissive parent' or a 'pragmatic parent'?

Most of the  parents who are  busy in being the provider and also carving a nieche for themselves would find this categorisation worthless worthless.
 Parenting Is task which continues 24/7 to  till the last breath . Who has the time to qualify and quantify parenting? A question asked very often present generation parents.

Let's first try and understand what is permissive parenting?
1) A permissive parent more or less 
functions with out any  set of  rules or boundaries.Most of the time such  a parent does not believe in defining or concurring to any orthodox defination of parenting.
2) Since the parent does not believe in limiting the child with in the confines of any  restrictions ,more often than not the child gets by  his/her unreasonable demands. Parent has no issues in over indulging the child despite knowing it's ill-effects on the child.
3)A permissive parent is soft and nurturing no doubt but may  fail  to provide  concrete guidance to the child . A permissive parent believes in allowing the child to take major decisions of life . The expectations of a permissive parent are quite different and rather low from the child .This thought process can be determental in  the academic/ professional/ growth of the child.A permissive parent prioratizes the immediate happiness and mental state of the child and is over all concerned about the self esteem of the child.
A permissive parent is a well meaning parent but the long rope which the parent extends to the child can be dangerous and damaging . For instance, a permissive parent may allow the teenage child to explore and experience the dark side of growing up . The  intentions of  the parent is that the child will learn about life by self exploration . However this can prove to be damaging and can bring harm to the child's way.

Pragmatic parenting on the other hand is also known as gentle parenting. A pragmatic parent is kind, systamtic yet believes in rules regulations and limits.
1) A pragmatic parent totally believes in a balanced and focussed approach.Despite  hectic work schedule and social comittments a pragmatic parent's main focus is the overall development of the child.
3)A pragmatic parent is a firm parent ,i.e some one who will impose restrictions and boundries yet is ready to accomodate and make few changes here and there to keep the child happy.Adaptability and flexibility are some of the tools which a pragmatic parent will use as per the situation.
4) A pragmatic parent 's major focus is to teach the child survival techniques and  lessons in life skills. Teaching problem solving methods, taking responsibility, accepting failure and learning from them are very high on the to do  list of such a parent .Infact  as per various reports 75%to 80% parents would like to be pragmatic/ gentle parents and are adapting the methods of this kind of parenting style.

In  nutshell one can say that a balanced approach to parenting is what can be  described as best method of parenting .
Styles of parenting may vary but the main objective of any parenting style is  to help the child develop into a happy and reasonable human being .

As parent, I don't think there is any set SOP of parenting.. parenting can be best described as process which is dynamic and has to  adopt to  different shades of life.

Permissive parenting... explore and experience on your own... joy ful yet not without perlis
 



 






Popular posts from this blog

Stress To Smile ...A journey worth documenting

Stress to smile is a journey from crooked lines  to  cute curves. 1)As a parent the most painful period is when we lose that  perfect alignment in our relationship with our child .  2)Like in any other relationship, parent and child dynamics also has its own ups and downs. Throughout the parenting journey from infant to young adult the power dynamics keeps altering and this causes silent stress to parents and children. 3)Unlike other relationships where we can step back and take a back seat in the relationship as a parent one cannot afford to do it .Whatever be the stress, how much ever be the stress as a parent we have to face it and brave it out.At times this constant gloom of stress takes a toll on our health and personal happiness. 4)The main reason why we face stress as a  parent is due to our lack of planning , our sense of authority and power play and most importantly our undue expectations from our child. 5)As a parent we need to have a clear understandi...
Read more

Friendship and Red flags..How to navigate

"If you see the red flag flutter too many times it's time to uproot the flag"  A friendship is meant to make you feel secure and strong. Pre teens and during teens kids invest in friendship emotionally. During teens when at times the world comes crushing down its the friendly banter with a friend which often  helps teenagers tide the troubles. "A friend in need is a friend indeed" ..a most common quote ,yet no other quote defines friendship better.A friend can do, what no one else can do during stressful teenage  times or as a matter fact during any phase of life. , A friendship forged during teen times in school or early college years stays permanently all through life.  However as teens one can be overly dependent on ones friends.This can lead to clingy behaviour, giving in to the unreasonable demands of friend and relying excessively on the validation of friends.This eventually leads to irritation and depleted sense of self worth. As teens our kids should be ...
Read more